I was busy reading some posts on blog of an author I love when I
realised why I started blogging in the first place. I started blogging because
I wanted to be a writer (and still do) and it was a way of getting started in
the writing world. To share y ideas and struggles on a platform where I could
look back and see how far I've come. A platform to use to my advantage. (Also,
I was told all writers have blogs.)
Back in 2011 when I started I was still in school. My dreams were dreams
and I didn't think far ahead. It was a subject which was better left unspoken,
unfortunately the last years of school only exist to prepare you for the
"real world" (which it didn't). Anyway, I didn't have much to blog
about or to share. School was school and life was life. Don’t get me wrong, I
loved school and still miss it, but there just wasn't that much I felt
passionate enough about to sit and write about. In my last year, 2012, I
started blogging more often about what was happening, movies I saw and things I
did. I loved sharing moments I was also preparing myself to be a consistent blogger,
because the next year I would be in the Nederland’s. I planned on blogging about
every experience; I did blog about most of them.
Time went by and I blogged and I didn’t and then I did again still didn’t
write about writing because I felt that it was too personal, I didn't want to
share my ideas or writings and I wanted to at the same time. It was a very
confusing period. Time whet by and I ended up in Belgium and I blogged about my
adventures. I also took down all my posts before 2015 and I don't see myself reposting
them again. Why? You might ask. Well, aside from some spelling errors I don’t
feel like that is my writing. I have developed my writing (and myself) so much
that those old posts don’t feel like mine. I changed the look of my blog and
loved it. Then a few weeks ago I was writing a blog post and realised my blog which
didn't have a theme now had one and it was travelling. Yes, my blog had sort-of
turned into a travelling blog. I don't mind, because I love travelling and sharing
my photography. But I want to also share my ideas, and writings and personal
experiences.
Then I asked myself why I hadn’t done this before. I came to one
conclusion which might not even make sense. I am an online perfectionist. I don’t
know if this exist and I’m not going to find out. This was the only description
which fit the situation. I can’t stand it when my online platforms are a mess. Those
old posts were not in the right mental state and the photos weren't in good
quality. I get frustrated on Instagram because my photos don’t fit together and
then I’ll go days without posting. My details on Facebook and twitter need to
be filled in or not at all. Everything needs to be perfect (in my way). This is
so ridiculous that i might not even share this post (just kidding!).
So my plan is to get over this online perfection disorder and start
expressing myself without all the barriers. I want to be able to post a photo
without the need to take it down again. I want to share my journeys and
experiences even if they aren't interesting or blog material. So from today
I'll be posting other stuff as well (not just travel) and hope you'll be back
for it!
Felicia
xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment